Getting Antsy

Ok, so the big day is tomorrow. In about 18 hours I'll be checking into the hospital to have the baby. So, of course time is dragging. I'm trying to keep myself busy. I'd nap, but I have too much energy. I guarantee I won't be able to sleep tonight, which isn't good because I'm really going to need it.

Everything is taken care of at home. My bag has been packed for weeks. I've finished up the freelance work I had. Now I have nothing left to do but wait, wait, wait. I do have a doctor's appointment this afternoon at 2:20. Not that I see the point in it. The doc just wants to make sure my blood pressure didn't go sky high over the past couple of days. But hell, I'm going in tomorrow...what's the point of checking on it today? I don't feel any different, so I'm sure I'm fine. But we shall see.

So I'm twiddling my thumbs and watching the clock. I'd try to write but my brain is in a thousand places right now. I had a dream last night that I was in the delivery room and a nurse was trying to convince the doc not to let me have any pain meds. Talk about a nightmare! I plan on being completely drugged up! hehe

Well, I'm supposing this will be my last post for a few days. If everything goes well, I should have the baby some time tomorrow afternoon, which would put me home some time on Sunday. Then I'm sure it will be a couple of days before I feel like sitting at a computer. But by the time I post again, I should have a picture or two up on my website.

That's all for now. I want to thank everyone again for their emails and phone calls. You guys have helped me more than you'll ever know.

Till next time...

Putting Things Into Perspective

I know I do a lot of bitching and moaning here. This is a place where I get my rants out so that I don't end up blowing up. But lately I've been feeling guilty for complaining. I mean, could my life be better? Sure. But it could also be a hell of a lot worse.

For example, I bitched about my porch catching on fire. Aside from fighting with the homeowners insurance and it being an eyesore at the moment, it really wasn't a huge deal. At least not compared to my friend. Her parents' house burnt to the ground yesterday. They lost everything. Thankfully no one was injured, but everything they ever worked for is now gone. And I dare bitch about a singed porch?

Another example, I'm extremely uncomfortable from the pregnancy. I've got aches and pains. But Christ, both my husband's grandmother and my great aunt are going in for cancer surgery this week. What the fuck am I complaining about?

I guess it's true that no matter how bad you think you have it, others have it worse. Sure I'm broke as a joke, but at least I have a place to live and food to eat. A lot of people don't. So yeah, life can throw you a curve ball every now and again, but it's best not to let it sink you. Not when there is so much to be thankful for. My family, my health, a roof over my head. I have a lot. So today, I'm not going to bitch. I'm just going to be thankful for once. Especially thankful that my baby is healthy and I'm going to be meet him by Friday. A blessed event in an otherwise crappy week. See...there is a silver lining. Imagine that.

Close But No Cigar

Had my doc appt. this morning. My blood pressure was up again. They examined me and found that I am 2-3 cm dilated already. So the doc sent me to the hospital to the doc on call. She said she felt I should have the baby today. So off I went.

They monitored me at the hospital for about 3 hours and took some blood. For some reason my blood pressure stayed normal the whole time, and my blood work came out ok. So they sent me home. The doc on call felt that to induce before 39 weeks without a really good reason wasn't wise. I'll be 39 weeks on Friday. So if I don't go into labor on my own before then, they're going to induce me at 6:00 am on Friday. You can walk around 2-3 cm dilated for over a week, so somehow I doubt I'll go into labor on my own. But at least I have a date now.

I was still thoroughly annoyed. I mean, I got my hopes up, was already at the hospital all hooked up. To go back home really sucked. I'm supposed to take it easy until Friday, so I'm just going to lounge around for the next few days. After I have the baby and semi-recovered (enough to get to the computer) I'll give you all the gory details. :)

In other news, I went out to a signing in Queens yesterday. Brian Keene and Michael Laimo were promoting their new novels. I had a lot of fun. I brought my friend Polish girl along with me. :) Adam Pepper and Geoff Cooper were also in attendance and we all went out to The Outback afterwards and shot the shit. A very good reading, and a good time afterwards as well. I needed that. Lord knows when I'll be able to get out like that again.

Other than that, things are things. The usual. So, I won't take up any more of your time. Until next time...