Not Much To Talk About

But I'll blog anyway. Nothing else to do tonight. Work is dead.

Just an update on the counseling. We had our first session last night. The counselor is very nice, I like her and I feel pretty comfortable talking to her. Fran seems to feel the same. He's very optimistic, which is a good sign I suppose. Me? I'm always negative and assume the worst, but I'll reserve judgment until we get to the end of our 6 free sessions. (Going through my company's Employee Assistance Program (EAP), so it's free, for now.) Not that I think we can solve our problems in 6 weeks, I just don't know if we can afford to keep working on them after that. heh

It's hard to tell if it'll work. She's still getting to know us. I think I'll have a better idea after the next session.

In other news, I've been getting lots of ideas lately for stories and novels. I just wish I had the time, energy, and motivation to get it done. Work sucks, it's getting worse by the day. I feel like the entire climate has done a 180. I first started and I felt welcome, comfortable, like family almost. Now I feel like an outcast, like I have to watch my back and can't trust anyone. I applied for a couple of full-time gigs in our training department, but I doubt I'll get them. My curse. I can't even seem to get full-time at another branch in the same position. It's almost like the whole damn company is against me. I've been looking outside the company too, sent out a few resumes, but no luck. This doesn't help my mood of course.

Anyhoo, it's almost time to lock up, so I best be going. Till next time....

Quick Update

I figured after yesterday's post, I should inform you of what's going down. I'm lucky enough to work for a company that has an EAP (Employee Assistance Program). Basically, any kind of problem or situation I could possibly find myself in (from trying to find a good daycare center to divorce advice) I can get help for free. So I looked into this service and was referred to a marriage counselor in town. I believe I get 6 free visits. Anything after that I have to pay for myself...but it may end up being covered under our medical. What the hell. I've never been one to give up without a fight. So we'll see what happens. I'm gonna give this counselor a call tomorrow. I hope to hell that she can make some sense out of all this confusion. While I'm at it, maybe I should get a referral to a shrink...though I know I'll need a hell of a lot more than 6 visits!

So that's that. Only other thing I have to add is that I'm having a shit day. But what else is new. Seems that nothing I do is right, and nothing I say can make any difference. I'm just having one of those "I'm worthless" days.

Though I won't be getting into specifics, I will report back on whether or not I think the counselor helps. Who knows, maybe one of you out there is going through a similar situation. If anyone can be helped from the hell that is my life, maybe I wouldn't be so worthless afterall.

Peace out...